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When Your Boss has a Favourite and it is You

By: Maggie Lonsdale BA (hons) - Updated: 15 Apr 2017 | comments*Discuss
 
Boss Favourite Colleagues Working Office

Good bosses really shouldn't have favourites, but it can be very hard if you have a member of your team who regularly achieves their targets, makes excellent contributions in meetings, gains new contracts and is a pleasure to be around.

If You Deserve the Attention

If that is you, then congratulations - you are doing a great job! What makes it a little tricky is how your colleagues feel about it.By being such a high achiever, you will inevitably get the back up of some of your colleagues. They will know that you are good at your job and they will probably like you too, as they know you are positive, hard working and good for the team.

The cliché that they will be jealous of you is absolutely true in this case - unless of cause you are far nicer to your boss than you are to any of your colleagues. If that's the case, you may not care what they think of you and just be incredible driven to succeed in your career.

This may be a good strategy for a period of time, but there will come a point when you need the support of your colleagues, or someone that knows you will be a client one day. You do not have to be bosom buddies with your colleagues, but it is not a good idea to suck up to your boss, even if in the short term you get the results you are looking for.

You could try to let you guard down a little bit - don't put on such an act. You can still achieve your career goals without looking down at your colleagues. Make sure that you still hit your targets while being a bit friendlier.

If you get on well with your colleagues and you are the bosses favourite, just make sure your hard work is recognised. Put forward a good case for a pay rise at your annual review and ask to be considered for promotion.

If You Don't Deserve the Attention

If you are the boss's favourite without actually being the highest achieving member of their team, you have other issues to deal with. Your colleagues will see your preferential treatment as unfounded favouritism and it will annoy them. You may be uncomfortable with the situation and be keen to change it.

You may be sending signals to your boss that you are not aware of - are you dressing a bit too provocatively, or do you flirt? Does he know your father or mother and is giving you special treatment, or are you connected in some way? You do not want to be treated differently - make sure you earn your stripes or you will get a shock if you go to another company and they just take you at face value.

If you find yourself in either of these situations, you ought to think about whether you like it or not. Being singled out by the boss can give you some benefits and perks, but you are also in a higher place to fall from if something goes wrong. In a sales or fast paced environment, you may decide to just utilise the situation and gain from it what you can, knowing that you could be in a very different situation.

Alternatively, if you are uncomfortable with the attention and know it could damage your professional reputation, either look for a new role or try to distance yourself from the situation. You don't need to make any grand gestures, but slowly change your behaviour or habits that may be misconstrued.

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Share Your Story, Join the Discussion or Seek Advice..
nahrah - Your Question:
I've been quit close to my boss, I mean very close. But recently, she brought up a new attitude, making me over-work to the extent of doing her domestic chores, the way she addresses mw dis days is giving me a feeling that am being slave-driven. Dunno what to do. Would Av resigned instantly, but am handling her special child and d bind is what's keeping me. She has not the slightest regard for the new family I just built.

Our Response:
Try putting something in writing - she sounds as though she's using your bond with her child to exploit the working relationship. Depending on the nature of your employment relationship (i.e making the appropriate tax/NIC contributions etc), you could try contacting ACAS for help.
WorkRelationships - 18-Apr-17 @ 10:18 AM
I've been quit close to my boss, I mean very close. But recently, she brought up a new attitude, making me over-work to the extent of doing her domestic chores, the way she addresses mw dis days is giving me a feeling that am being slave-driven. Dunno what to do. Would Av resigned instantly, but am handling her special child and d bind is what's keeping me. She has not the slightest regard for the new family I just built.
nahrah - 15-Apr-17 @ 4:31 AM
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